From Personal Pain to Purpose
Divorce is a life event I never expected. In a twist of irony, my divorce became the reason you're reading this. I've learned from my personal experience, and my mission now is to share these insights, with the hope that you can avoid the pitfalls I fell into, whether you’re married or planning to be.
The revelation came when my ex-wife candidly shared that had I practiced what I now advocate in my book, we might still be together. It hit hard, realizing how much emotional turmoil both of us went through. The truth I've discovered, after speaking with numerous women, is that many of them grapple with the decision to end their marriage for years.
My story:
Our love story began with a blind date, a reunion from our college days. We dreamed big, from homes by the lake to mountainous getaways, aligned in our aspirations. Yet, the first cracks appeared when she transitioned from medicine to retail. The 2008 recession hit us hard, which included some financial stresses. But the real disconnect, I came to understand, was emotional. She often said, "you never listen to me." I mistook her plea for mere words, not understanding the depth of her need to be heard and validated.
It really hit home when I learned she had found solace in conversations with others. One of the many truths you will learn is that she has to feel heard and understood. If not from you, it will come from someone else
In the end, even counseling couldn't salvage our bond. Realizing I wasn't meeting her needs was a bitter pill to swallow. The heartbreak of watching our relationship crumble was indescribable.
The Road to Redemption:
Post-divorce, I embarked on a quest to understand where I went wrong. From relationship coaches to spiritual gurus, I dived deep into understanding relationships and communication.
Here's what I've learned:
Many programs exploit your vulnerabilities. Yet, amidst all the noise, the recurring theme was the importance of providing security – be it physical, financial, or emotional. Emotional security, particularly, was my blind spot. Simply put, it means making your partner feel heard and understood.
This journey has brought me here — eager to share my knowledge and, hopefully, help reduce the global divorce rate by 10%.
Before The Communicator:
Distracted, self-absorbed, short attention span, busy with his phone, ignoring everything else.
Reading The Communicator:
Quick read (alone or together) to help (re)connect, revitalize, restore, and revamp your relationship.
